It is Hannah's birthday Monday. She wanted to have a birthday party and I told her she could have a gift OR a party.... so basically saying if she chose a party, that would be her gift. Because she LOVES to hang out with her friends, the birthday party sounded much better than anything she could unwrap, so she chose a party!
One event she looks forward to EVERY year is Winter Jam... it is tomorrow and she really wanted to go. I had $50 for the birthday party and I told her that if I had $10 left after buying what we needed, I'd give it to her to buy a ticket to Winter Jam. However, by the time I made her cake and bought stuff to make chili for the party along with a couple bags of chips, there wasn't anything left.
She talked about Winter Jam every day and I told her we'd just have to take that request to God and see what His answer would be. It was starting to look like she wasn't going to be able to go. We ran some errands and she mentioned it several times when we were out, and I was trying very hard not to feel bad about it. I just felt God would take care of it even though it was the "11th hour". When we got home, there were two birthday cards in the mailbox with money inside. I said to her, "I knew God would come through!" and she just smiled from ear to ear.
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
Grace for Grace
We shared a few minutes at church on Sunday about our experiences over the last 19 months. It was somewhat overwhelming trying to decide what to say.... how to condense 19 months in just a couple of minutes! It was a good exercise, however, to think again about all that has occurred, all we have learned, all the ways God has provided for us physically, emotionally and spiritually. I know that our faith has grown in ways that it never would have outside of a trial. We have come to know God so much better and have come to love Him more.
For me, the last 9 months of starting a business has been more difficult than the 10 months of job hunting before that. I think that is because the time of searching for a job allows you to always be looking towards something that might just be your light at the end of the tunnel. While, building a business... well, I guess I just feel like we were thrust back in the middle of a long tunnel again. We believe God opened up the doors for the business and it is hard to understand why He still is not using the work we do there to meet our physical needs. It was what I fully expected, and I have had to readjust my thinking a serious bit! I have come to believe that God is just taking our trust level up another notch. Having gone a long 19 months without a paycheck is unbelievable. There is absolutely no way it could be possible without God mastering the whole thing. I should testify again to you all.... our flour and oil still are not empty!! We have not missed a payment, we have not missed a meal. It doesn't make sense when you look at it from the natural.... only within the supernatural is it possible.
If you have a chance, listen to the FBC podcast. (Yes, we've entered the 21st century at FBC! Just go to the itunes store and search our church's name.) Pastor is doing a series of messages about God's grace. The first two were wonderful. One of the things he talked about this Sunday is that every need in our life is an opportunity for God to share His grace.
For me, the last 9 months of starting a business has been more difficult than the 10 months of job hunting before that. I think that is because the time of searching for a job allows you to always be looking towards something that might just be your light at the end of the tunnel. While, building a business... well, I guess I just feel like we were thrust back in the middle of a long tunnel again. We believe God opened up the doors for the business and it is hard to understand why He still is not using the work we do there to meet our physical needs. It was what I fully expected, and I have had to readjust my thinking a serious bit! I have come to believe that God is just taking our trust level up another notch. Having gone a long 19 months without a paycheck is unbelievable. There is absolutely no way it could be possible without God mastering the whole thing. I should testify again to you all.... our flour and oil still are not empty!! We have not missed a payment, we have not missed a meal. It doesn't make sense when you look at it from the natural.... only within the supernatural is it possible.
If you have a chance, listen to the FBC podcast. (Yes, we've entered the 21st century at FBC! Just go to the itunes store and search our church's name.) Pastor is doing a series of messages about God's grace. The first two were wonderful. One of the things he talked about this Sunday is that every need in our life is an opportunity for God to share His grace.
He also talked about how God provided water, manna, and quail for the Israelites when they were wandering in the dessert. They were instructed to collect the manna every morning, and they couldn't store it up for the next day or later. Pastor compared that to God's grace. His grace is "new every morning". God's grace from yesterday is not for today. Every day that you experience grace in your life it becomes easier to trust in God in many ways, but you can't depend on yesterday's grace for today, or store today's up for tomorrow. "Fresh needs, fresh supply". It was such a great explanation of the cycle I find myself in during the struggle to remain optimistic and to continue to trust in God when things aren't going the way I would like them to. It is frustrating to me when I'm running on empty.... I feel like I'm being weak and failing. But, after Pastor's message I have a new understanding of this... each day I must go back to God for another measure of grace... enough grace to get through the next day. Or on a really bad day... enough grade to get through the next hour.
"Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness."
They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness."
Lam. 3:20-22
"From the fullness of His grace we have all received one blessing after another."
John 1:16 (NIV)
Sunday, January 06, 2008
Remember when the Israelites were at the edge of the Promised Land for the first time? They sent spies in and two came out saying the land was wonderful, while the others came out spewing doubts and fears.
The Israelites responded to Moses: "Where can we go? Our brothers have made us lose heart. They say, 'The people are stronger and taller than we are; the cities are large, with walls up to the sky.... "Deut. 1:28
While we wait and struggle and hope and pray for this business to grow...... there have been many moments when I have been like those brothers in the above verse... I have been counting the giants, calculating their height, and factoring our odds. But, God reminds me that we must not react in fear when God has opened the door. In the past, He has gone before us in the "desert" and met our needs over and over again. Quite honestly, the giants are still pretty scary... we ARE the little guy in the picture, but we have a great big God!!
If you look back at the early days of this blog, you'll see that God has performed small miracles in our lives for months and months, we've witnessed His love, power and provision in our lives, we've experienced amazing answers to prayer. God will continue to go ahead of us, fight for us, and carry us when we need to be carried until we reached our "promised land".
I am choosing to trust God "in this".
----
On another front, I never did share that God provided a wonderful Christmas for our family. We had plenty of food, gifts under the tree and family in our home. I had prayed and asked very specifically for something regarding Christmas that I don't feel I can share the specifics of here.... but God answered that prayer in exactly the way I asked. I know God is not our Santa Claus and He sometimes says no to our requests. But, this is one time when He said yes in a big way and showed me once again that is working on our behalf each and every day.
The Israelites responded to Moses: "Where can we go? Our brothers have made us lose heart. They say, 'The people are stronger and taller than we are; the cities are large, with walls up to the sky.... "Deut. 1:28
Then I (Moses) said to you, "Do not be terrified; do not be afraid of them. The LORD your God, who is going before you, will fight for you, as he did for you in Egypt, before your very eyes, and in the desert. There you saw how the LORD your God carried you, as a father carries his son, all the way you went until you reached this place." Deut. 1:29-31
"In spite of this, you did not trust in the LORD your God." Deut. 1:32 (The KJV says, "In this thing you did not believe the Lord your God.")While we wait and struggle and hope and pray for this business to grow...... there have been many moments when I have been like those brothers in the above verse... I have been counting the giants, calculating their height, and factoring our odds. But, God reminds me that we must not react in fear when God has opened the door. In the past, He has gone before us in the "desert" and met our needs over and over again. Quite honestly, the giants are still pretty scary... we ARE the little guy in the picture, but we have a great big God!!
If you look back at the early days of this blog, you'll see that God has performed small miracles in our lives for months and months, we've witnessed His love, power and provision in our lives, we've experienced amazing answers to prayer. God will continue to go ahead of us, fight for us, and carry us when we need to be carried until we reached our "promised land".
I am choosing to trust God "in this".
----
On another front, I never did share that God provided a wonderful Christmas for our family. We had plenty of food, gifts under the tree and family in our home. I had prayed and asked very specifically for something regarding Christmas that I don't feel I can share the specifics of here.... but God answered that prayer in exactly the way I asked. I know God is not our Santa Claus and He sometimes says no to our requests. But, this is one time when He said yes in a big way and showed me once again that is working on our behalf each and every day.
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